Author Archives: buffy

The Omen Would Have Been Better with Chows

She labors under the assumption that Rottweilers are highly intelligent.  Based on patient observations of the new one next door, I am not quite ready to award big IQ points just yet.  The thing barks at the sound of his own pitter … Continue reading

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Dogs Get a Pass on Matchy-Matchy

Outfit from my Luigi.  Goes with the Chicken-Prizes harness.  Also, she detailed my wheels and the cat colony is exploding.

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Him

I am slightly hungover from partying yesterday.  I am also in love.  Again.  I must have him for my own, but he is very far away.  She needs to bring me to him.

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I’m Back

Apparently I am to to assist with the excitable Akita down the street, who hates me for my freedom.  This is acceptable, as long as a) I get at least as much chicken as she does, b) I can buzz … Continue reading

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My Wheels

She has installed a podium to facilitate my positioning and footing for optimum head-out-car-window operations, which I appreciate.  I am also feeling bouncier thanks to especially rigorous PT. Between all this exertion and the Turtle-in-my-house (see Item 52) compensation squeaky panda needing especially … Continue reading

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Excellent

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S E N D H E L P

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I Dislike Water On Me But It Doesn’t Matter To Anybody

I am to be brought back to the underwater treadmill, which is rubbish.  I don’t care about my knee.  I don’t want to go in the bloody tank.  Just let me kill some animals so I can get some endorphins happening. But … Continue reading

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My Dopamine Receptors

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Fine

So I go from 5 000 supplements per day to 5005 or whatever.  I’ll live with it if it means a chicken chaser and no more godforsaken Chinese herbs surreptitiously mixed into my food.  That was hell on earth.  I could have … Continue reading

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